Friday, December 18, 2009
So the pic to the left is me, my tubes, and my awesome fanny pack lol
So last night my surgeon's nurse Laura called me to give me results from my pathology report from surgery. On my right side they took about 1 1/2 inches of tissue and all the margins (that is the area all around the cancer) were clear. The also took 16 of my lymph nodes on my right side. Dr. Webber (the surgeon) likes for less than half of the lymph nodes to be cancerous. Only 2 of my 16 lymph nodes were cancerous. Last the sample they took from my left side was cancer free as well. So this is all a praise report and another testimony to how God is faithful to his promises. :) Psalm 9:1 "I will praise you, Lord, with all my heart; I will tell of all the marvelous things you have done, I will be filled with joy because of you. I will sing praises to your name, O Most High."
Laura said she wanted to wait about 6 weeks to give my body time to heal before we began the next step of treatment. That next step will probably be chemo and then radiation. I will not lie that the thought of loosing my hair is one that terrifies and brings me to tears. However, it is just hair as many people have told me. A woman is more than her hair, more than her body, and more than her looks. This has definately taught me that its what on the inside that counts. Truth of the matter is that one day we will all pass away...our bodies will return to ashes and all the things that we thought were so important like our hair and makeup will no longer matter. I guess that is soo much easier for me to say right now seeing as I still have my hair. But if the worst thing that comes out of this is loosing my hair then I will survive. I have began to look at many things to differently in just the past few days after surgery that I almost can not explain it. Things that I used to get mad or frustrated about now seem to stupid so small compared to the big picture. I know that probably sounds like what most people who are faced with a big illness say...but that is honestly how I feel. I wish there was a way without wishing an illness on people that the world could look at things this way.....I believe it would change so much.
But on a more positive note today is my 1st real days without the pain pumps and I can say that pain is not really a problem it just I am sore. My arm has a weird empty feeling...which could be from the fact that the 16 lymph nodes that were once there are gone lol....im just sayin.
I wish I could express on my blog with my words...how much love and support I have received. I usually cry with every card, flower, text, facebook message, email etc. that I have received. It have moved me beyond words and given so much hope and strength. I have said it before and can say it again that the words "Thank You" do not do justice to how grateful I am.
Psalm 13:5-6 But I trust in your unfailing love. I will rejoice because you have rescued me. I will sing to the Lord because he is good to me"